Mistaken
by Clarista
Summary: TV Based, CB: This is a very VERY dark CB future fic late twenties


Disclaimer: I own nothing

A/N: This is a very dark, I mean VERY dark future fic about Chuck and Blair. It's not too far off though, they are about 26-27 during the time span of the story.

It was half past noon and Blair Archibald, the Marcia Brady of UES, was as pertained to schedule bent over a gleaming white toilet bowl. She would finish up and follow through with a nice long shower in which her puffy sobbing face could be recovered into its usual indifferent perfection. She would then dry off and put on expensive silk lingerie and disappear under the 1000 threat count sheets of her bed, drifting off to dreamland in her afternoon nap. It was perhaps the only time during the hectic day of this WASP Queen when she actually had any real moment of relaxation. Came nighttime and she would lie in the very same bed on her side and facing away from her husband. She would lie this way as stiff as a board and completely unable to sleep. When she would eventually doze off it would be very brief and highly troubled. A cycle between this state and that of wakefulness was a night well spent in her expensive UES penthouse.

As she now lay in her bed, free of the figure of her husband whose presence in their bed had eventually progressed to evoke repulsion, she was finally at a sort of peace. She would sigh in exhausted relief and free her mind of all thought, most of which were troubled anyway. Today however, even after purging and her warm shower, comfort of mind would not be had. Blair's brain buzzed all through and she merely could not shut any of it off. Eventually she gave in and allowed her mind to toy around with memories and reflect on all that had passed.

Blair was now 26. She was only 26. It was a fact that she herself had a hard time believing. Her age as young as it was would never reflect her life, for Blair in this short time had experienced every misery that was offered in the world…well as much of which an upper class wealthy person could. She had given up her heart's greatest desire, she had given him up in fear of repercussions. She had martyred one of her only true friends for a dream, an elaborately structured plan, only to have it all collapse on top of her and for her dream to transform into a horrid nightmare.

Blair now laughed bitterly thinking up on the actuality that had once been her dream. She had as hoped so dearly in high school, eventually reconciled with Nate, but it wasn't until collage when that had happened. She was home for Christmas, dining at the Basses for Christmas Eve, when she had seen them; Chuck Bass and Nathaniel Archibald. The boys were off talking in a corner, looking very much the UES handsome bachelors that they were. The boys had made up before their junior year was up and spent the summer before collage travelling together. Neither had reconciled with her or attempted at it.

Blair had watched them through careful glances. Both attended Duke and had been completely unseen by her since before the end of their senior year and yet despite this lag of time Nate was very much the same pretty boy in looks. He was to her as familiar as he would have been if they had stayed in correspondence. Chuck was another story. His features, pale and exotic as ever, were slightly different than she had remembered. He was better looking that her memory told, but his face in person would always blow away the picture she held in her head. It was rare that the sight of him would not shock her and invite her whole being to marvel the beautiful creature that the boy was.

Upon seeing them she had hoped to warm into Nate, perhaps one day pick up the pieces from where they had been dispersed, and yet in her heart all she ever wanted was to run her finger tips along Chuck's jaw-line and make an attempt at his lips with her own. She knew at that moment that she had to do everything in her power to avoid Chuck; that what she dismissed merely as sexual longing, would not stop her from achieving her ultimate goal. Blair, despite being of an aristocratic class, knew very well that hardship was to be endured to achieve success. She had stayed on coarse; within two years Nate had proposed.

Blair now shuddered despite the warmth that surrounded. Had she known what marriage to Nate was going to be like…but had known. She had only to think of their relationship taking up the full 24 hours of her life. She had only to realize that how Nathaniel made her feel as a boyfriend would be void of all time outs when he became her husband. She had known and yet so willingly had she accepted. Blair shuddered again.

She remembered the first few months of their marriage; she had thought that their non-existent sex life in university would change at this point. It had not. They had little sex even when they first moved in and even less so as time passed. She could hardly remember the last time they had sex, though it was worst now that they had given up trying for a child. If the lack of sex put a strain on their marriage it was nothing compared to the three miscarriages and Blair's subsequently losing her periods. They had seek medical help of the best, but the good news being that neither was genetically impotent followed by a grim health report that Blair's stressed underweight body would never support a child. It seemed like their 2.5 children were never going to happen and Nate, though completely void of expressing such thoughts, clearly blamed her for it. They had eventually stopped trying and with it stopped Nate's nagging about her seeking professional help for her _problem_ (though Nate was completely aware of her bulimia he would never mention the term in fear that she would actually acknowledge it and seek his help). Now that Blair thought about it, it was probably a good four months since they had last had sex. She laughed bitterly again, and this time hot tears streamed down the corners of her eyes.

As horrid as her sex life with Nate was it was not a huge change from what it was before. Even the one rendezvous they had back in high school was not one of great wonder. She was sure it had exceeded his half drunken experience with Serena, but to her who had enjoyed the feel of Chuck Bass thrusting inside of her, a taste of true passion, the fifteen minutes Nate had gently slipped in and out her was merely nice and nothing more. He had never once even gave her an orgasm…and she would not dare touch herself in front of him. Now when they had sex, it was even more disinterested and lacked the pleasantness she had felt in those earlier days from the high of conquering her dreams. She would now just lay there, barely look at him and wait for him to finish. It was no longer anything she desired, but only did it as duty, even initiated at times so that her husband would not leave her. She did not care if Nate strayed, not as long as no one knew. It had taken her four long excruciating years as an Archibald to realize that she did not love the man she had married. If anything she hated him for the mockery he had made of her fairytale dream.

Had she come to this realization sooner…

If only she had followed her heart…

Despite all that happened, the horror that her marriage was, nothing hurt more than the sight of Chuck. Chuck Bass the millionaire playboy, UES most eligible bachelor…the man who had spent the past five years overseas charming princess and beautiful heiresses, using top models as accessories and young celebrities as his weekly flavors…the man who at first sight looked like a runaway runway model…

Blair had frozen where she stood. For a moment she had lost all senses, believing that this was another dream…but he looked too beautiful for a figment of her imagination.

It had all happened the day before when Blair and Nate were out shopping for new cutlery on the occasion of their upcoming anniversary dinner. They had been walking about, Nate moody and as silent as a wall with Blair chatting away a mile a minute, when they had spotted him, making the disaster that was Blair Waldorf's life turn inside out.

Nate had lost all senses of propriety. He ran across the Manhattan crowd, pushing people out of his way, before finally capturing Chuck in what appeared as a bone crushing embrace. Blair watched the boys in shocked silence following Nate only after she was sure she would not fall immobilized to the side of the street, should she move. She had greeted Chuck in as indifferent a manner as she could muster, and he in his boyish excitement engulfed her small figure into his arms. Feeling his arms, his scent…for a second she was calm and then just as suddenly it was all cold. She moved back with trembling knees, willing herself to keep her cool mask.

Chuck was bursting with news; he had much to say and Nate much to ask. It was a moment back to their early teen years when Nate would listen in fascination to Chuck's accounts of his travels and mischief, both wishing that Nate had taken part. Blair listened to them in fascinated silence, a small smile forming at the corner of her lips. She had missed Chuck, he had been the heart of their little circle; in these past years no one had received fresh blood, no one had enough life. She so badly longed to touch him, his arm his neck, his chest…anything would do. She just wanted to receive some of his warmth.

Half in delight and half in torment she watched as Nate accepted his old friends request to join him at his suite for drinks. They entered the exquisite place Bart had reserved for his son and Chuck led them into the living room where a pair of young beautiful maids could be seen arranging an elegant array of finger food upon a beautiful round maple wood table. Chuck complimented their work and dismissed them, turning to his old friends with a smile.

"Please, make yourselves comfortable."

Nate gave him a quick half hug before besetting himself and Blair opted for a mere handshake when Chuck leaned forward and hugged her once more, this time it was perhaps even more excruciating. Without realizing she had been holding her breath and once he had let go she gasped for air, her lungs on fire. Chuck pretended not to notice. Nate didn't care, he paid too little attention to Blair; he blamed and despised her for the sham that was their marriage and his life.

Just as Chuck seated himself across from the Archibalds the door of the penthouse burst open and the figure of a small boy appeared, running at full speed to where Chuck was sitting on the couch. Chuck enthusiastically picked him up and after a big hug and a good number of big wet kisses (all of which the boy in vain had tried to resist, pushing the older boy with his outstretched skinny hands), chuck settled him on his knee and asked about his day. Nate and Blair watched the boy in shock, wondering who he was and why Chuck was reacting so familiarly and affectionately when—

"Daddy, daddy. I got you something. Me and Anika—"

"Anika and I," Chuck corrected laughingly but the little boy didn't seem to notice.

"It's just like the one bigfoot stole. Anika says that you like it lots."

Just then the figure of a short cubby blond woman joined the father and son handing out to chuck a small black box. Chuck thanked and dismissed her before turning to the box and seeing the contents within. After his inspection he turned to the little boy and took a long moment to outpour a great deal of affection by hugging and kissing and playing with the tiny bodied creature on his lap. He then finally having remembered that Nate and Blair where still present, sitting right across from him with gaping mouths, quickly grinned and showed them that he had just received a beautiful pale blue and grey scarf. Seeing the looks on their faces his grin widened and told them that the little minx on his lap (he nuzzled the side of the boy's hear with his nose at this) had put his old one temporarily out of business by stealing and losing it...to Bigfoot who had, naturally, taken it from him by force. Chuck then, aware that Nate looked ready to ask the questions he was expecting, asked the boy to take his new present "to daddy's new drawer" and to get Anika to prepare him his late day snack. The boy kissed his daddy's face, taking delight in slopping his spit all over it before jumping off the couch and running with his tiny little legs, to the opposite side of the place.

"Chuck, when—who—"

Chuck leaned back on the couch and took a deep breath before answering Nate.

"It was an accident you know. His mother and I were casually dating…but never mind that. Really, he has been the best thing that has ever happened in my life…"

Nate's shocked stare turned into a grin at this and went over to give Chuck another hug, this one lasting a good bit longer. Blair stayed put, struggling with all she had to stop the tears that were in a dangerous verge to spill. From the moment she had seen the young boy she had known; his little face was a miniature's of Chuck. The eyes, the lips, the pale skin and the dark hair… he looked exactly how she had always imagined _their _child to look like. Now, gripping fistfuls of the couch cushioning, Blair forced herself to keep her calm and after taking a short slow breath she too left her seat and put out her hand for a handshake, and this time Chuck watching her cautiously, was content with just that.

It was two weeks before anyone had a chance to meet Chuck's baby mother. She was a part of some ballet event in Moscow and was to join Chuck in New York on the morning of the Archibald anniversary dinner. Blair had desperately wished for the event to last longer than predicted, for the girl to find some reason or other to stay in Russia a day or two more, or best of all meet a man more dashing than Chuck Bass to fall in love with—Blair knew all this was in vain. She was to meet the horrid girl and watch Chuck's family, the family that should have been _theirs_, and smile. She contemplated playing sick, signing herself into a private hospital even to avoid the dinner, but in the end she resigned. As always Blair Archibald would save face before all else, even if inside her devastation had no bounds.

Her name was Amena…and her last name, Bass. Chuck had married her nearly a year after she had given birth. His love for his son, so innocent a thing, had driven him to the impossible.

Chuck had met her in Moscow. He had admired her as a ballerina and looked forward to what seemed like the beginning of another affair, this one with a Russian flavor. Once he had met her in person, seen those wide baby blues and soft rosy features he almost felt guilty for his intentions…but not enough to keep him at bay. He took joy in her tender quiet ways, it was almost like possessing something so very delicate, something you had to tend to with so very great care. She reminded him of a side of Blair he had so very dearly enjoyed, the side of her closest to his heart. Of course Amena was nothing like Blair; she walked around with her vulnerability out for all to see. She in her flaunting delicacy gave him a chance to forget his sorrows, his heartache, and exercise his desperate need for affection by taking care of her. Would he have eventually grown bored and moved on? Sure, but then the baby arrived.

Chuck was completely unaware of the pregnancy; he had left Amena before even she knew. Her family had made many desperate attempts to get her to have an abortion, but she would not oblige. They had then arranged for her to give a very private birth and an even more private adoption, but again she would not oblige, to the later that is. It was a month or two after the birth when Chuck had found out. Amena's father had given him a call. Chuck had spent the next two weeks going on a sex binge and then another week drinking smoking and watching an array of cartoons. Finally he had made up his mind and got his jet up and about for a trip to Russia. He would go and he would see the baby…that was all. He had no plan, he figured he'd decide after he'd seen him. He had.

He was invited to stay with Amena's family for as long as he wished; he had been there a week when he decided that he wanted his son. Chuck had always been a great sensualist and deep inside starved for affection. He would not admit it, but there was a little boy in him who wanted his mommy, one who didn't run off with an Italian soccer player. Seeing the boy was déjà vu…he really looked just like Chuck. And just like that Chuck had his hands full and a warm blanket that was his new family wrapped snug around his wounded heart.

Chuck was not in love with Amena, he would never fool himself into thinking he was. He had long ago come to the bitter conclusion that only one held his heart and that was unlikely to ever change. He was content with this however and did not regret marrying her. He had cared for her during the short period when they had dated and after their son had been born, a creature so pure and accepting that Chuck learned to love as a part of his very own soul, he had decided that he owed it to the boy to make a place for Amena in his life. He had eventually come to love her, but again, he was not fool enough to think that he would fall _in _love with her.

That night the Basses were seated across from the Archibalds. It had been Nate's request who had not yet seen nearly enough of his best friend. The boys talked although dinner completely oblivious to what surrounded and Amena, to Blair's great relief, was not the type to talk much. All this left Blair free from the need to keep civil conversation as she struggled to sit still, hushing her raging heart. It wanted her to scream, kick, and shout. It wanted her to cover the rosy face across in the contents of her plate, or knock the table over, or…or to rip off her top, perhaps then it would get Chuck to look at her, to see her the way he once had. Blair would not listen to her heart, she never had and this was hardly the time to start. Instead she opted to empty her plate…using every shred of self control to keep herself at pace. She then left for the kitchen, excusing herself politely beforehand. There she would attack dish after dish until she was good and ready to purge. By the time she had reached the bathroom she didn't even need to use her finger, her body had no plan to keep anything down.

That night Blair had made two more such trips. Nate hardly noticed, or perhaps didn't care to. Chuck had however. Blair had never done this at a party. They were the only times when she was content, not necessarily happy, but elegant parties were a consultation prize for her Queen Bee image…the only thing she truly enjoyed from being Mrs. Archibald. Trust Chuck Bass to ruin what was supposed to be one of her favorite nights of the year, the biggest dinner event of the Archibalds.

On her third trip away from the guests Chuck excused himself and followed her. He stood behind the closed door listening and wondered how much Blair had to hate him, hate a life with him, to choose to live out like this. He wanted to break down the door, to stop and to hold her—but she didn't want him. His embrace would be a worst fate, a punishment of sorts. Suddenly he too had the urge to puke, he was certainly nauseous…

It took Blair another two weeks to see Chuck. She did not join Nate on the frequent time he spent with his best friend, but she heard a great deal about it. While Nate was not one to elaborate on the events of his day, well certainly not to Blair, he would tell her in great deal about anything revolving around the Basses these days. Blair knew that he was overjoyed to have Chuck back, but she also knew that there was more to it than that. Nate especially loved Chuck's son, he was to him almost like the son he himself never had, the son Blair kept him from having. He took sadistic pleasure in talking at length about the boy. Blair would just sit there and smile and Nate would find her in the early hours of the morning, sprawled out across the bathroom rug.

It was a Thursday morning that she heard Amena was taking the Bass jet out to spend the weekend at her father's. It was her grandparent's wedding anniversary, an important event for her family. She would take her son with her, but not Chuck. Blair rejoiced in this news. Her Chuck Bass had not completely changed after all.

That very day Blair paid him a visit. It was late afternoon and she expected he would be at home getting ready for whatever plan he had for the night. She knocked twice before he opened, watching her with cautious eyes. He did not seem surprised.

Blair did not plan to say much, heck she might not have said anything at all. She simply strolled over and grasped his forearms with white fingers, laying all of her weight over onto him. He hesitated then swept his lips over hers.

"Don't tell me you've been faithful Bass."

Chuck didn't respond and only kissed her harder. He had cheated; he did it when the mood sway. Amena probably knew, but she would never leave him for such inane things.

Blair pulled away and stepped back. She then freed herself from her coat. She wore nothing underneath. Chuck held his breath; it had been so long since he'd seen her…he reached over to her stomach with his fingers. Blair in turn had missed his hands.

They had already had sex when Amena walked in. They didn't notice her for a good while, nor did they notice the nanny sneaking the sleeping child to his room. They had sat in his bed, Blair on his lap, stealing kisses as they engaged in their familiar bedside banter. It was Blair who had first seen her, watched the color drain from those pink cheeks. It was tragic; she looked like a little girl who had just witnessed the death of her favorite pet.

Blair had jumped right off and within seconds she had her coat and she was out. Once the door had closed behind her however, she pressed her back to the door and hoped (as much as she hated herself for it) that Amena would follow her out. She waited a full five minutes. She planned to return to Chuck's arms, comfort him as he had her. There was no sign of Amena.

It was until the next morning when Blair had found out what happened. In a call to Nate Bart Bass reveal to Nate that Chuck had woken up to a police call. Amena had snuck out of their bed and jumped off the edge of their balcony. Nate had gone off immediately to find Chuck and the child and Blair would eventually pass out from sobbing on the white furry bathroom rug.

The funeral was immediate. Her family in its entirety was present. They had known the extent of Amena's delicacy, but they could not understand what Chuck could have done to throw her off. His adultery was common knowledge and a thing practiced by both her brothers…surely it had not been the sight of his indiscretion that had done it. It was not. It seemed that Amena had seen more than sex that night. Either way the befuddled family would not wait to rest all the blame on Chuck and even threaten his custody of his son.

Chuck appeared unphased by all this. He would take it and stand tall. At the funeral he would not budge from the first row. His father and Lily had joined him along with his young son. Behind them the fashionable people of Upper East Side (there for the Basses) and equally as fashionable Europeans (there for Amena's side), would exchange rumors in whispered breaths. Adultery; it was what they all believed had caused Amena's death. They all blamed Chuck and had black boxed him; it was a thing Bart Bass had always feared for his boy. Nevertheless he and his wife would stand behind him, as would their children common or not. Nate planned to as well.

The night of the funeral Blair left Nate. She returned the ring and deserted their home. Nate did not object. The funeral had done a number on him. Blair had told him that she was leaving him for Chuck. That she loved Chuck. Nate was not mad. He walked her to the door. He even embraced her goodbye. He figured it was for the best. This way there would never come the day when he would find their furry white rug stained with blood.

Blair had spent the night at Serena and Dan's and would meet Chuck early in the morning, before his jet was scheduled for flight. When she arrived he had been going for a walk, and admitted to his plans of a stroll along the graveyard. Blair had joined him. This was the closest he could get to visiting Amena's grave. Her body was transported to Russia the night before.

There was something about the graveyard, a morbid fascination that even shook twenty something youths to their core. Blair wormed her chubby fingers into his fisted hand and hold on till they had arrived again at his penthouse. By then the nanny had the young boy up, and he was rubbing his eyes grudgingly, very obviously without great morning spirit. Blair laughed and for the first time drew the precious child into an embrace. Chuck watched in fascination and held his breath as Blair straightened up. She was now holding the little boy's hand and looked up at Chuck with fierce eyes. Blair wanted to tell him that she was here to protect him, take care of both of them, but the words were caught in her throat. Chuck smiled, the most sincere smile he had worn his whole life. He didn't need her to say anything. He understood.

No bags, no clothes, and really with nothing except the contents of her Chanel purse, Blair was off to whichever place Chuck had settled with his pilot as their destination. It wouldn't be for another year before they would return.

By April that year Blair was a good five months pregnant and sat lazily on Bart and Lily Bass' couch while Eleanor, Lily and Serena fussed over her. Nate had come over to congratulate her that morning and he too was asked to come back for dinner. His relationship was the first she and Chuck had seek to remedy, and miraculously it had been done. Now Nate pulled little Edmund off her lap, urging him that his strong manly five-years-old figure was too much weigh for his mommy to handle. He had then settled the handsome little boy on his own lap.

Chuck and Blair had first planned to elope but finally decided that a small elegant wedding would be more dear. They had also decided to come back, black boxed or not. Once here and aware of the baby however Blair demanded that they wait for his or her arrival and after she had lost the weight. Chuck had laughed and agreed and eventually decided with Blair on a large ritzy event. Scandal or not, Chuck and Blair planned to get back to the top, they had been the natural born King and Queen of UES and no one would keep them away. No one had a chance when the Basses gunned for the throne. Besides, as Chuck put it to Nate, they were filthy rich and money could not be wasted in a better way.


End file.
